Body Positive
I can’t tell a lie, I like to wear a good swim brief. I like the snug, shapely fit, and the feel of the fabric against my skin. I like both the look and the feel, and often think I project more confidence when I wear them. And yet when I go to the beach I wear the baggy swim shorts that everyone in the States expects me to wear. Why is that?!
There is lots of criticism about how women’s bodies are portrayed in the media and how this promotes negative feedback loops, shame, and issues with identity and body image. I think it is essential that we all recognize this and work for change. I also think, however, this is much more universal than we typically acknowledge in our culture, and body shaming is something many men experience as well. I don’t wear my swim briefs to the beach because I feel ashamed, and I am afraid that I will feel awkward and as though I am doing something wrong, that my body isn’t good enough for this kind of look. Unfortunately, I think women are taught that they need to look a certain way, and I think men are taught not to look a certain way. Women are taught to flaunt their bodies, while men are taught to hide them.
I am from a generation when in high school or college if a man was wearing something other than boxers, it would be assumed there was something essential wrong with him. Where did this come from? As a man, for so long I’ve been taught – by both my culture and my partners – that my body and all its curves and assets should be hidden. Women are taught to flaunt their curves but I need to hide mine? I don’t understand, and I think it took me years to overcome this stigma. And I think it is really my discovery of fine, high-quality, designer underwear for men that helped me make these changes within myself. I love wearing a thong and my satin panties from Body Aware, and I love talking about it and having people see me wearing these things too. Because they make me feel good, I have no doubt that boast in confidence translates to better connections with the people in my life.
As I’ve gotten more involved with social media, I’ve noticed a new trend – men using these platforms to promote a new kind of body awareness and positivity. I don’t know if you follow the Body Aware Instagram feed (@bodyawareunderwear), but if not I’d encourage you to do so. One of my favorite features of it is when they share pictures made by their customers flaunting themselves in Body Aware briefs and thongs. I like seeing normal people like me proudly showing themselves in cute little panties and undies, promoting a confident and true sense of themselves, with pride in their bodies. Indeed, I’d like to encourage more of you to share your pictures with @bodyawareunderwear, and help support a growing movement of men who love undies and swimwear and proudly sharing this with the world. All of us have beautiful bodies and speaking for myself, really discovering fine underwear and swimwear has done so much for myself image and personal confidence. I have a much better feeling for my body since I gave up so many of these hang-ups and gave in to my love of satin briefs and skimpy thongs. I can also say embracing myself this way has paved the way for a much healthier and supportive connection with my partner. Let’s promote pride in male bodies and a body-positive approach to how we dress and interact. Body positivity, words worth repeating, and an idea I want to see more us advocate. I’ll finish by offering a promise, this summer I will wear one of my swim briefs to the beach – and do so without shame – and I’ll report back with another post about that later ;)
Signing off for now!
-Brian
24 comments
Very interesting comments – I fully agree men should be allowed to wear sexier clothing they can relax and feel good in – maybe though I have gone to the opposite angle – I love men’s leggings wear them with or without shorts – I garden and walk in them and find comfortable and practical – maybe I should try these beautiful clothing items too – although I’m attracted to the new bodysuits – there is also the important factor of well being and confidence clothes can introduce which helps in daily life. I look back in horror at the frumpy clothes of yesteryear, maybe helps encourage for me anyway a heathier body image and encourages a greater level of fitness – a tonic maybe against obesity. I garden for my clients in leggings without objections – I wonder about wearing thongs though ! One gentleman mentioned naturist – now that’s a nice idea but will I ever be confident enough ? We need to be comfortable within our bodies and enjoy them too, it’s healthy and natural.
I think what needs to happen is that more men need to have the confidence to wear bikinis, have fun, and also be seriously adamant about wearing them. As men, We also need to take the wearing of these items more seriously by not mocking or fashion not wearing a ridiculous looking novelty items.
That means correcting your silly friends when they mock people who do wear bikinis and thongs. And also supporting the women too.
I typically reserve the shorter, tighter swimsuits for when I travel for work. They take up less space in the suitcase and allow me to flaunt a little bit more with a bit more confidence since I don’t really know anybody at the hotel pool or hot tub. The Patriot Trunk is a favorite but recently I have tried the Rip Stop material, despite is being kind of see through. I have received a lot of compliments on the Patriot Trunk and a few intriguing looks with eh Rip Stop. We should all be proud of our bodies, men and women alike, and celebrate our beauty outside and in. I am developing the confidence to wear them around my hometown beach but I may keep my kinky swim side to the work travel!
Great topic.
I have often wondered why men had to be ashamed of their bodies. Covered up – for what? Why? You are who you are.
I cast off the dork shorts ten years ago while working overseas and I haven’t looked back. Bikinis and thongs are my go to. Quick drying, flattering and great tan lines. My wife loves me in them – she likes a confident guy. I’ve noted more tolerance on California, Florida and Hawaii for non-dork wear. There is still a stigma, but – hey – I’m not the one wearing wet pantaloons on the beach. Keep calm…thong on.
Great topic that compelled me to respond, Brian. I’m a 45-year old triathlete with an athletic build but definitely not the perceived body shape people would think. I only wear swim briefs to the beach or pool and haven’t worn hideous board shorts in over 10 years. I don’t plan to ever again as they are not practical attire. Briefs make beach activity much easier and better tan lines.
I have found that the awkwardness has lessened over the years and that it mainly was between my ears. My wife warmed up to it too and now appreciates the fact that I’m that confident enough to wear what I want and take care of myself.
I get complimented by men and women often and I haven’t ever heard anything negative said directly to me. If there was an issue, it’s on their end and they probably moved on. This means more beach for me and even better social distancing. Right?
Be happy, wear what you want!😃
Of course all the guys that raced at top level before the introduction of fast suits all wore speedo like briefs that were 2 sizes down to get the same low rise effect. Thats probably why the more senior generation still go for a brief.
There is a drive from some in the Ocean Swims competions in Australia that only briefs should be accepted as against fast suits.
As a boy our cozzies were cotton and baggy. Thank goodness for lightweight nylon and later spandex etc
I find the discussion of shorts lengths fascinating. I recently watched the special features on Mary Poppins movie with my kids and that shows the male dancers rehearsing the chimney sweep scene wearing very short gym shorts. I looked up the date of the movie – 1964, 56 years ago! I wonder what drove the change in men’s shorts length since then. Were women’s shorts always short, and if so why did the styles diverge so much between the sexes? It would be an interesting subject to research, the change in style of men’s and women’s shorts over the years.
It is interesting to see the generational divide on this issue. I’m 67 and only wear speedos except when staying in resorts or high end resorts when decorum suggests high end, European short swim trunks. In the 1970s and 1960s, men had nylon trunks to swim in. The surfer board short was a fringe style. Basketball teams wore shorts with 3-inch inseams, so did track teams. when playing sports we had to wear jocks. Along with Vietnam and the civil rights movement and it seems the feminist movement, men started hiding their bodies. By 2000 Basketball shorts were knee length, swim shorts were bigger than boxers. And, no, you can’t really swim in them; if you believe otherwise go join a masters swim team!!!.
Thanks for that. I agree one hundred percent! I’m a naturist so the no-clothes option has always been my preference but, when you gotta wear something it should make you look and feel as good about yourself as possible. Peace and thank you!
I’m glad to see so many other men in their 70’s choosing to wear what they want, not what current style dictates! I am 74 years old and still wear skimpy Speedos to the beach and even while tanning on my patio in my apartment complex. I love the snug fit and the sexy tan line they create, As for underwear, give me a sexy thong, g-string, or backless brief and I am happy! Silk, satin, nylon, spandex…they are all good! I may not have the swimmer’s build I once had, but I don’t let that stop me from feeling great about myself. Men are more interested in seeing, feeling, and touching than you might think. Been flirted with and propositioned numerous times even at my age. Have changed attitudes of several men who now wear skimpy underwear and swimwear and I still drool when I see them!
In UK and Europe generally, bikini style swimsuits are still quite common on the beaches, although perhaps not as much as 10 years ago. The ugly baggy shorts common in USA are unfortunately taking over here now. It interesting that shorts in Europe and Australia tend to be much shorter than in USA, where only expensive designer brands offer anything less than 7 inch inseam, Why is it that women all wear short shorts, and look great, yet some men for some reason think they have to cover up their legs to their knees? Men can look as good and sexy as women in shorts shorts and abbreviated swimwear. What do other Brits think?
In Brazil men wear skimpy swim suits all the time. Those log legged baggy ones are frowned on and if you wearvrgem, people make you feel very uncomfortable. I am 76 and would wear skimpy tight fitting Swimwear if it wasn’t for my protruding belly. I do wear skimpy tight fitting underwear.
Many thanks for another fantastic blog. I can relate to your struggles. I have started to wear Speedo type swimwear on the beach, and I love it. But I do feel a bit like the only male there wearing them, and that can certainly leave me feeling very self conscious. On another note about being body positive. Most men I know don’t look like the models on the body-aware website, is this not pandering to the stereotype of an ideal male body? Surely this can leave some of us feeling very body negative?
I agree with all of the above. I’m in my early 60s and still wear a bikini when I go swimming and, frankly, no one cares. If someone is there to enjoy the male body, they’ll look. If they don’t care, they don’t care. In my neighborhood where it’s very hot, I jog/walk in short nylon running shorts and have for years. I’ve begun noticing more and more often men are wearing shorter shorts instead of the knee length basketball “things.” Even on the local college team that I support, I’ve noticed for the past couple of seasons some of the player’s short are getting shorter. I say “great” to all that. Men’s legs are gorgeous and I think we should show them off (as well as a few other things).
A speedo is the best for tanning and swimming. Board shorts aren’t.
I have always worn skimpy, snug, sheer thongs and g-strings everywhere, especially in secluded areas like Orchard Beach in the Bronx, the Ramble in Central Park and also in the locker room of my gym, where I work out religiously five times a week. I like the pleasurable feeling they give me and the attention I get from other men, who often approach me to compliment me on what I am wearing. The conversation often continues in my apartment, where I love to show my new buddies my extensive collection of sexy items, before inviting them to try on what they like. We always end up having a lot of fun together. When I wear sexy underwear or swimwear, I love the fact that my large front is gently compressed and protruding in a very visible way, while my muscular butt is exposed and the elastic string creates an enjoyable pull in my most sensitive area.
Pleased to hear other > 70s still happy in their Speedos or budgy smugglers as they are called here in Aussie land. I cannot see how you can swim and be comfortable in boxers etc. Better to feel comfortable in low rise brief. Also as a 75 yo still enjoy a thong etc
Ive worn these types of underwear,swimsuits,for many years and now in my early 60’s.I wouldn’t change a thing.I love all the new designs,styles and colors available today.I wear it everyday as well as sleep and just lounging.You never know whats under my clothes.I Love it all and the hot guys modeling it! Keep it up folks!!!
I, too, am in my late 70’s and am still a lap swimmer. Like Donald, I couldn’t care less what people think. I still have a good body and am not afraid to wear speedos and trim square cuts occasionally. I’m too old, and too confident to care anymore. Thongs? I wear them under my shorts all the time.
I wear what I like, whatever is comfortable for me, I wear speedo type, or other snug boxer style swim wear, I do not have a swimmers body anymore, and if someone doesn’t like it, well that’s their baggage to carry, at the end of the day, as long as I’m happy, and have lived my life, and not hurt anybody, it’s all good.
Why should only women get to experience the pleasure of exposing themselves to the warmth of the sun in minimal swimwear?
Amen to that. It’s taken me all my life to find exactly what you said to be oh so true. I’ve found that I live wearing skimpy awesome fitting thongs and nice swim briefs. The whole thing of ugly boxers in high school and college are true. I hated wearing them they never got right to me and just wore them because it was the “normal” thing to do. I don’t have the 6 pack bod but I have learned to live my body and I’m proud to wear my swim briefs to the beach. If people don’t like it don’t look I’m me.
I agree. I am 72 years old and still wear speedo swim suit. I am proud of my body and do not care about people looking at my package. I feel good only wish I got the nerve to wear a thong to the beach. I do wear thongs under my shorts and pants they feel great and hold everything in place.
Thanks Brian, that post really pushed me in the right direction. I also grew tired of the way I was supposed to look, and I still waiver but I’m in a much better mindset to keep pushing for me and let people look at me as I FEEL not sticking to a stereo type.
I love BA and it styles it makes me feel unique especially when I’m wearing your thong underwear to a high pressure board meeting with a bunch of stuffy people. If they only knew.